Show Your Anxiety Who’s Boss by Joel Minden

show your anxiety who's boss

Show Your Anxiety Who’s Boss is all about responding effectively to anxiety, a challenge we all experience.

Whether it is minor symptoms that can be shoved under the rug or fears of uncertainty that holds you back from performing normal day-to-day activities, anxiety persists. When anxiety tends to take control of your life, routine work feels like a chore and you will want to return to your cocoon instead of facing your fears.

Having dealt with anxiety, I could relate to certain instances and examples mentioned in this book. When faced with an anxious situation, we tend to divert our mind to something less stressful. This ‘diversion technique’ builds over time and we keep avoiding the situation more often. Finally, there comes a time when we have no other option but to face it but anxiety takes precedence and we will end up with a panic attack or worse.


This book explains CBT techniques. If you have gone through CBT before, I am sure you could relate to the methods explained here. The book is divided into three parts. The first part is called “Make peace with uncertainty“. Life is full of ups and downs. There are things that are beyond our control. But when one is over-thoughtful, seeds of ‘fear of unknown’ is sown in the mind. Over time, this seed grows into a weed and multiplies. “Make peace with uncertainty” gives you techniques and tips to shush the over-reactive mind.

The second part of the book is “Stop avoiding situations“. This reminds me of the quote from Sadguru’s Inner Engineering. Sadguru says Responsibility means the ability to respond to a situation. Instead of avoiding things that make us anxious, take baby steps. Maybe, once or twice, we would fail or be embarrassed. With time and patience, you can say bye-bye to things that once made you feel anxious.

The third part of the book is “Accept and redirect anxious thoughts“. Note that this is not same as “avoiding situations.” There are tips and sarcastically funny wordings that you can use to redirect thoughts. There’s one such sentence that I really loved (and I would use it when faced with anxious thoughts): Say, you wake up and plan happy things to do (go for a movie, paint or spend some time in the park, etc) and Mr Anxiety throws a fearful thought in your direction. Say “Thanks, Mr Mind, I was planning to do happy things today. Thanks for spoiling it!” Sarcasm. 😀 You could also say, “Thanks for trying to spoil it but try harder the next time.” That’s how you Show Anxiety Who’s the Boss!

I recommend this book to all those who are dealing with anxiety. If you want to get a sneak peek into how CBT sessions work, you can use this book as a reference. Please remember, if anxiety is beyond control, it is better to seek help. CBT might take time to work but it helps a lot.

Many thanks to New Harbinger and NetGalley for the ARC.

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